by Ryan Wilson (Staff Writer)
“Unnamed Poem”
It’s hard to love the world
When you’ve never loved yourself
When you’ve been taught never to love yourself
They wanted to contain our hearts
So they planted us in small pots
So our compassion may know boundaries
And call those borders the world
They told us to grow big
Knowing we were displaced
Doomed to grow at the expense of ourselves
And collapse into our own emptiness
How did they rob you from the earth?
My hair was too unruly
My nose was too wide
I was rooted in skin too dark and too light to be beautiful
My mouth was made to be too big and too loud
With lips you called ugly
Until you kissed them
And then you wanted more
Taught me to smile
So you would only see what you desired
So I would seem less dangerous
So you could see a part of me in the dark
In the blackness
Even I learned to stop seeing myself
The mirror only reflected disappointment and
Muddy brown eyes that promised I could love them
if only they were clearer
if my lips were thin enough to
pull back into that charmingly crooked smile that always pairs so well
with a head of messy
(not kinky)
Brown hair
I had to write myself into love
Transplant my characteristics onto characters that are supposed to embody my struggle
But who cannot both look like me
And be relatable
Because a Mockingjay is a whole lot prettier than a Jim Crow
And Force is never good when it comes from the dark side
The world loves to dream of fighting Capitols and Empires
Am I not the voice you’re looking for?
They knew we were seeds
That’s why they would rather we hang
Or bleed out on asphalt
We are only allowed to be planted in boxes
Lest our roots grow deep
Intertwine
And empower those they tried to bury with us
Lest we learn to find humanity where they said there was none
Lest we learn to love ourselves
And beyond
